10.09.2013

USA Today Interview

Cookies, pie, ice cream …

HAPPY EVER AFTER

written by Joyce Lamb, (no relation to Cathy Lamb) USATODAY12:43 p.m. EDT October 9, 2013

Cathy Lamb…Three Things That Inspire My Book Ideas…

• Images. I had an image of a crying woman throwing her fluffy wedding dress into a dead tree on a deserted street. That launched Julia’s Chocolates. I had another image of a woman dropping peanut oil into her cheating boyfriend’s condom. He was allergic, although not deathly so, to peanuts. My husband of 20 years is allergic to nuts. I was mad at him that day. That image became The Last Time I Was Me.

Out in August, 2013

• My life. Many years ago I wrote an article about bariatric surgery for obese people and their difficult journeys. That article launched Such a Pretty Face. Stevie Barrett loses 170 pounds, and her whole life changes.

The idea for Henry’s Sisters came, partly, from a Goodwill advertisement. In it, a beautiful young man with Down syndrome is being hugged by his father. I was so touched by that photo. He became Henry.

• Anything. Lavender. Art. A psychic. Wind. Hood River. A beauty parlor. A crime. Mental health issues. Marriage. WW II. Herbs and flowers. Ancestral lines. Cupcakes.

If You Could See What I See is about Meggie O’Rourke, who just returned from traveling the world after a tragedy in her life. “You could ask me where I wandered,” she says. “I would tell you I took a skip and a dance into hell.”

Meggie has been appointed the CEO of Lace, Satin, and Baubles, a lingerie company founded by her grandmother, Regan O’Rourke. Regan came from Ireland, “After sliding off the curve of a rainbow with a dancing leprechaun and flying to America on the back of an owl.”

Regan refused to talk about her past, but the scars on her back told a harrowing story. She expects Meggie to turn the faltering Lace, Satin, and Baubles around … by tomorrow.

Meggie has a ribald, nationally renowned sex therapist mother and two fiery sisters who sometimes throw mannequins at each other.

As a marketing tool for the company’s website, Meggie decides to film the employees talking about their favorite bras. She hears humorous, heart breaking, riveting personal stories.

This book is about the messiness of family. It’s about love and marriage, when we can leave and when we can’t. It’s about women and lingerie, overcoming and moving forward.

Find out more at cathylamb.org.

Share this:

2 Comments »

10.01.2013

Author to Author Interview: Liane Moriarty

Liane Moriarty
Uber Photography

Cathy Lamb: I loved The Husband’s Secret. I read your book instead of writing my own. Now I’m behind and scrambling.

Anyhow, back to you. Here we have a lovely family and yet the husband is just tortured on the inside by his decades – long secret. How did the idea come to you for this book?

Liane: I’m sorry you’re behind with your book! I do exactly the same – read one more chapter, when I should be writing one chapter. My inspiration for The Husband’s Secret was a fascinating article I stumbled upon about real life deathbed confessions. I learned about Christian Spurling, who confessed on his deathbed to faking a notorious photo of the Loch Ness Monster.

There was a famous songwriter who was dying of cancer and wrote a letter admitting, after years of adamant denials, that she had plagiarized a lullaby melody.

Then there was the hapless man who, after suffering a stroke, confessed he’d killed his neighbor thirty years earlier. The only problem was that he didn’t end up dying. After he was released from hospital he went straight to jail.

The article, particularly the story of the man who didn’t die, got me thinking. I was intrigued by that overwhelming desire to share your darkest secret. That’s when I came up with the idea of a man who feels such a powerful desire to share a secret that he sits down and writes a letter to his wife, to be opened in the event of his death. It’s a deathbed confession, except he’s not dead.

Well, Liane, now no one who has read The Husband’s Secret will ever write a death bed confession if they’re alive and healthy…

One of my favorite reads this year….

I also read What Alice Forgot. Could not put that book down, either. I ate too much chocolate while reading it. A woman loses ten years of her memory when she falls off her bike at the gym and hits her head. When she wakes up, she’s still in love with her husband, but they’re separated and headed for divorce and the kids are falling apart.

What a gripping plot. I loved all the real life marriage issues that you hit on, too. What was the trigger for this plot line?

Thank you! You probably ate too much chocolate because of Alice’s obsession with it. My inspiration for What Alice Forgot was my obsession with time travel.

I’d always been intrigued by the idea of going forward in time and meeting my future self. What would I think of the person I’d become? Would I like her? Would I be shocked?

I wanted to write something about this concept, but I always got tangled up in the logistics (not to mention the believability) of time travel. That’s when I read a story about a woman in the UK who had lost a few decades of her memory and didn’t recognize her own children or anything about her current life.

It was like she was a teenager again.

I realized that memory loss was like a form of time travel. So I came up with the idea of a woman who loses ten years of her memory after an accident at the gym. She thinks she’s 29, blissfully in love with her husband and expecting her first baby. In fact, she’s 39, with three children, and she’s in the middle of a bitter divorce.

When I was reading this, as someone who has been married for over twenty years, I thought, it’s amazing what ten years can do to a marriage. There are many joys, and many struggles, that you cannot predict will come down the pike on your wedding day.

So, tell us. How do you write your books? By outline? Do you sketch out characters first? Or, do you have a general idea of where you want to go and you sit down and bang it out? How many edits per book?

I tend to just come up with the premise and then take it from there. That makes it interesting because when I sit down at the computer each day I don’t know what’s going to happen, but it also makes it nerve-wracking because what if nothing happens?

As a result, I do tend to procrastinate by editing what I’ve already written, over and over, rather than taking the story forward.

Besides the procrastination, what does a typical day look like for you? When do you write?

I have a five year old son and a three year old daughter. My daughter has just started preschool two days a week, so I fit writing in between drop-off and pick-up, hanging the washing on the line, talking to Mum while I empty the dishwasher etc.

Up until this year I could only write when I had a babysitter to take care of the children. She would come for 3 or 4 hour sessions and I would close my office door and write. This is the first year I’ve had two child-free days and I blissfully assumed I’d be SO productive in the silent house. In actual fact, I work much harder when I know there is someone there to observe me wandering out of my office for yet another cup of tea.

A friend suggested I hire the children’s nanny even when they’re not there. She could sit outside my office like a sentry. I’m seriously considering it.

Liane, I have three kids, they’re 16, 16, and 20 now, but the only time I found to write when they were younger was from ten at night until two in the morning, then I’d be up about 7:30 the next day. Exhausting. I get the challenges you have.

I put some of the issues/sadnesses/challenges in my own life in my books now and then. I might downplay or exaggerate them, or I might just take the emotion I felt and give it to a character. Do you do that, too? Borrow from your own life for your books?

Absolutely. Any time something bad happens to me, I comfort myself with the thought that at least it’s good writing material.

Me, too. I think, hey, one more problem to give to my next character.

When you were a child, what did you want to be? What were your favorite books?

I think I knew from when I was quite young that I wanted to do something with writing. For most of my school years I was adamant that I would be a journalist. I’m still not entirely sure why that didn’t happen. Instead, I accidentally ended up in advertising and stayed there.

My favorite books as a child were the Famous Five series by Enid Blyton, the Chronicles of Narnia by C.S Lewis and the Mary Poppins books by P.L. Travers.

I still have my copies of the Narnia books. How I loved them. I think they are a huge reason I became a writer. They set my imagination on fire.

Five things you want to do in the next twenty years?

Clear out my wardrobe. Cook a whole roast chicken like a grown-up. Write a book from just ONE character’s point of view, so readers will stop getting cranky with me about having too many characters in my books. Learn how to stop reading my reviews. Travel again! (I haven’t left Australia since the children were born and I’m getting itchy feet.)

Oh yes, avoid all negative reviews, concentrate on the positive ones, and keep writing. Chin up, carry on, and all that. That’s what I do. Sometimes those reviews are brutal, and they sound so PERSONAL.

I want to travel TO Australia, by the way. You want out, I want in.

What are you working on now?

I’m working on a new novel but I’m not sure what it’s about because I keep changing my mind. Also, I keep finding that other people have already written novels using my startlingly original ideas. So that’s upsetting

Well, shoot. That is upsetting! How come they’ve already used your original ideas that you’ve just thought of? The nerve!!

Thanks so much for the interview, Liane.

Visit Liane at her website: http://www.lianemoriarty.com/

Share this:

2 Comments »

09.27.2013

Book Groups

Here is a little secret: I love book groups.

I love chatting with women here in Oregon and all over the country. If you would like me to visit your group, either at your home or through your library’s book group, or via SKYPE, email me at CathyLamb@frontier.com.

These are some of the more amusing comments I’ve heard over the years at book groups:

“My husband is an asshole. He’s like Slick Dick in The Last Time I Was Me.'”

“My husband gets irritated sometimes with how much time I spend with the kids but I say to him, ‘The kids hug me and want me to read them stories but you always want to have sex. Of course I’d rather read stories.””

“The guys from the fire department came to take care of my husband, AGAIN, but I knew they thought he was crazy. He thought he was having another heart attack. His third that week. They didn’t say it, but I heard it: My husband is anxious about his anxiety that’s what causes his heart to beat so fast.”

“How much money do you make, Cathy?”

“My daughter shaves her legs too much. Is that weird?”

“Should we take off our tops like they did in Julia’s Chocolates?”

“Pot is now legal in Oregon. Do you think we should get a joint for the next book club meeting?”

“Oh my gosh. We finished ANOTHER bottle of wine!”

“You know that sex therapist in your book? How did you learn all that?”

I visit many book groups during the year. If they’re within twenty minutes of my home, I go to their home. If not, we skype or chat via speaker phone.

I’ve skyped with ladies in New York and Massachusetts, Florida and California, a whole pile of other states, and Canada. If there was a book group on the planet Pluto, I’d skype there, too.

Here’s what I’ve learned: All books groups are fantastically, mightily different from one another.

They all have different goals. Some book groups are very intellectual/literary. I have sat and been drilled about everything from character and plot development, to tone, symbolism, metaphors, pacing, structure, who are my favorite literary writers and why, etc.

Then there are groups who talk about the book half the time and chat and laugh the other half of the time.

There are other groups who read the book, talk about it for fifteen minutes, then dive into their lives. Their book group is a social group. Period. Some of ’em don’t even hide that anymore.

Then there are groups of women who simply want to meet me, don’t want to talk a whole lot about the book, and did I want more wine? How about a couple more glasses? Beer? Vodka? They have that, too. (I don’t drink, but they do their best to make me happy.)

One of my favorite groups only wanted to sit down and have dinner with me. They came in laughing and drank a whole ton of wine. It was a neighborhood book group, no one drove, and they stumbled home singing and chatting. They wanted a nice girlfriend sort of visit. I did not envy them their Book Group Hangovers.

Another book group was the Laughing Book Group. My stomach hurt when I left we laughed so hard. They were all fifty – plus and life was fun.

I once went to a book group that was very, very quiet, almost somber. No one laughed. Not once. They took their reading seriously. I could tell that my book, Julia’s Chocolates, was a wee bit too wild for a few of them. Perhaps they had not liked, Breast Power Psychic Night? Perhaps, Your Hormones and You: Taking Cover, Taking Charge, was a little much? Love scenes too graphic? I don’t know.

Some groups are small, only four or so women, others are thirty – plus. The age range in most of the groups varies from women in their twenties to women in their seventies.

They want to know how I come up with my ideas, (wild imagination) how I write the book, (carefully, obsessively) what my daily life is like (just like theirs), are my characters based on real people (no), etc.

One woman asked me how I could write about an advertising executive (Jeanne Stewart in THE LAST TIME I WAS ME), when I had never been an advertising executive. I found that comment rather interesting.

If I could only write about the occupations I have had – McDonald’s when I was fifteen, day care worker when I was in high school and college, fundraising work in college, teaching fourth graders, freelance writer, writer, wife and mother – that would make for very dull books.

Anyhow, ladies, I’m happy to attend your book groups. Email me at CathyLamb@frontier.com, and we’ll set up a time.

Happy reading.

I think these women had a little TOO much fun when I visited their book group and discussed Julia’s Chocolates…

Share this:

2 Comments »

09.23.2013

Author to Author Interview: Rosanna Chiofalo

Author Rosanna Chiofalo

Cathy Lamb: Our guest today is Rosanna Chiofalo, a wonderful author from New York City. (Pretend I said that as if I’m on a talk show and am wearing a pretty dress and red high heels instead of my old jeans and a t-shirt.)

What do you like most about being a writer? Least? I happen to love the daydreaming part but I am not so fond of the deadline part where I wander around in pajamas muttering to myself and meowing back at my cat. It makes me feel slightly crazy.

Great question! I like exploring my characters in great detail to not only get to know them, but also discover what makes them tick. I also enjoy the fictional worlds I create in my stories. What has been the most satisfying experience for me as a writer is getting feedback from my readers, especially when they understood what I was trying to accomplish with my stories.

I have been moved by readers who felt that I have brought back warm memories of their own Italian American upbringings or even memories of a parent or grandparent who is no longer with them. It’s amazing to see the connection my readers have had to my books!

One of the most moving e-mails I received from a reader was from a woman who told me she was on dialysis, and as a result, she could not travel. But when she reads my novels, she is able to travel to Italy where my books are also set. I had never thought that my books could make such a difference in someone’s life, and it is very humbling to be able to do so.

I’d have to say what I like the least about writing is the discipline and the pressure to complete a novel by my deadlines. So far, I have been able to meet my publisher’s deadlines when writing my novels, but while working on my books I hate that thought in the back of my head that the days are ticking off the calendar and I still have to complete my novel!

Also, since I am a freelance copywriter in addition to an author, I am always writing. So the temptation to not work on my book one day or other can be great! My latest obsession for the past four months has been watching all of Giada DeLaruentiis’ shows on the Cooking Channel and Food Network, and then trying her recipes every week. It’s a great way for me to unwind and not think about writing for a bit.Needless to say, my husband has been eating like a king lately, and he’s not complaining 🙂 !

Anyway, some days all I want to do is curl up on my couch and watch back-to-back episodes of Giada’s shows, but I can’t because my writing is waiting for me!

Can you send me some lasagna? Your husband is a lucky man. My husband would love it if I cooked better. My kids say I “re-heat.” Sheesh. They’re lucky I feed ’em.

Tell us about both of your books.

My first novel BELLA FORTUNA is about a young woman, Valentina DeLuca, who owns a custom-made wedding gown shop with her mother and two sisters in Astoria, New York. After making countless brides’ dreams come true, this is finally the year that Valentina will be tying the knot in Venice! She’s engaged to her childhood crush, Michael Carello. But Valentina’s life takes a quite unexpected turn of events. The book is also set in the magical city of Venice.

My second novel CARISSIMA is also partially set in Astoria, New York. But the last third or so of the book is set in Rome. A few of the secondary characters we met in BELLA FORTUNA make an appearance in this book. Italian silver screen legend Francesca Donata has mysteriously arrived in Astoria, much to the shock and pleasure of the residents who cannot fathom why a famous star would be in blue-collar Astoria.

Even more mysterious is her connection to Signora Tesca. All the neighbors wonder how an introvert like Signora Tesca could know divaesque Francesca Donata.

Pia Santore is staying with her Aunt Antoniella for the summer while she does an internship at celebrity magazine Profile. When she hears that the famous star is in Astoria, she hopes to snag an interview with her. She believes the interview could help her burgeoning journalism career.

At first, Pia believes she has nothing in common with conceited Francesca, but as she gets to know her, she discovers they have more in common than she initially thought. And as Pia falls in love, she will be forced to confront the ghosts from her past as well as the present. Likewise, Francesca has skeletons in her closet that she will be forced to confront.

I think we all have skeletons throughout life we have to confront. I, personally, don’t like skeletons, their bones rattle too much, and they’re scary, but it is what it is, right?

But moving on. Was it always your plan to be a writer? What other jobs have you had?

Yes, it was always my plan to be a writer. As a child, I was a bookworm! And as such, I could not imagine doing anything that was unrelated to books. After majoring in English in college, I began working in book publishing as a junior copywriter after answering a classified in The New York Times.

I worked at Penguin USA and loved every minute of it! I worked for a few other publishing houses as well before my husband and I relocated to Austin, Texas, five years ago. However, we only stayed in Austin for a year and returned to New York City.

My career in publishing has spanned to 21 years! In addition to writing my novels, I am a freelance copywriter for several publishing houses in New York. Now that I am a published author, I still have to pinch myself to know my childhood dream of becoming an author has come true! It’s been a wonderful blessing.

People are always curious about when and where writers write. I do my best writing late, late at night when I can calm down and think in quiet. When and where do you write each day?

I write in a corner of my bedroom that I’ve set up a tiny desk for my netbook. When guests visit my husband and me, I always joke that he has the huge desk and he’s not even a writer!

But living in New York City forces one to get accustomed to the smaller living quarters. When I lived in Austin, TX, we had an office/guest room in which I had an enormous desk! How I miss that! But someday I’ll have that monstrosity of a desk again! LOL!

Some days, I go to the library just to get out and be around people. But mostly, I do write from home. I mostly write in the mornings, when my brain is the freshest, but I also write in the afternoons. I rarely write in the evenings. I’m too busy cooking all of those Giada DeLaurentis recipes and getting in some quality time with the hubby!

You have two jobs, you busy lady. It makes me tired thinking about it. I will sit down and relax and eat chocolate FOR you.

You write cover copy for most of the publishing houses in New York City and you write novels. Tell us about the cover copy writing.

I used to joke that when people heard I was a copywriter for publishing houses, they would always ask me, “Do you have to read the book to write the jacket copy?” Yes, I do have to read the book. But since I love reading, I don’t mind! I believe copywriting has also helped my novel writing in that it trained me to just get my ideas down on paper and worry about perfecting the sentences later. It’s helped me overcome writer’s block.

Also, with all the reading I’ve done for copywriting, I have been able to draw on the books I’ve read for research in my own writing. It really is true that in order to master the art of writing one must read, read, read!

What’s it like living in New York? It sounds exciting to me. Coffee shops everywhere. Take out at two in the morning. If you lived somewhere else where would it be?

Living in New York City is never dull. I was born and raised here and love it, but I also have a hate affair with it from time to time, especially as I get older and want more quiet in my life, which is hard to get when living here.

I did live in Austin, Texas, for a year five years ago, and I missed New York terribly! It’s particularly difficult for someone who has lived in a large city for quite some time to then move to a much smaller city. Austin was great and now there are things about that city that I miss. And while Austin has grown quite a bit in the past few years, it still paled in size to New York.

I found myself missing the myriad of things to do in New York City and all the varied ethnic food. But the crowds and noise in New York City can get to you as well as the faster-paced, more stressful lifestyle. I would love to live in San Diego or even Italy!

Now that’s an Italian last name…have you researched your ancestry?

Yes, my name is quite Italian and a mouthful 🙂 ! And it’s always butchered, especially since most people do not know that in Italian, “ch” is pronounced with a “k” sound. So my name is pronounced “KEY-OH-FAHLO.” While I knew that it would be hard for most people to pronounce my name correctly, I always knew that if I got published some day, I would write under my maiden name to honor my father’s memory as well as my Italian heritage.

My wonderful husband understood when I explained to him. My parents emigrated to the U.S. from Sicily in 1961, and to now see our name on a book cover is very moving, especially when I think about the many sacrifices they made.

No, I have never researched my ancestry, but my uncle who lives in Sicily has. Supposedly, we have Spaniard, Greek, Irish, and possibly even Native American in our ancestry. I wasn’t entirely surprised by the Native American since I have had a fascination with their culture dating back to when I was in second grade. I used to joke that if reincarnation does exist, I probably was Native American in another life since I have always been so moved by what happened to them.

In my first novel BELLA FORTUNA, I actually talk a little about a Cherokee belief that one of the characters believes in. My husband and I love to travel, as you can see from all the vacation photos I’ve given you! One of my favorite places in the world is New Mexico, mainly because of all the Native American culture there. I forgot to add Santa Fe, New Mexico, to my list of places where I’d love to live!

Rosanna! You forgot to mention my home state – Oregon!! You must visit, at least. Beaches and mountains. The cool city of Portland.

So what are your grand plans for the rest of your life? Where do you see yourself in ten years, twenty, fifty?

Oo! I wasn’t expecting that question! LOL! I’ve never been one of those people who makes plans a decade or so down the road. I do set goals for my life in general, but I don’t specifically say, “In ten years, I want to sail the Amazon.” Hey! Now that’s a goal! I just would like to be able to continue writing novels that my readers enjoy, and as always, I want to see more of the world.

My husband and I are going to Barcelona, Spain, in November, and I can’t wait! I’ve never been to Spain! I hope to be able to go back to Italy next year. It’s been eight years now since I’ve last visited. I’m also dying to go to South America, Thailand, Bali, New Zealand, and South Africa. Now that I’m writing books that are also set in other countries, I need to keep traveling so that I can write about them in my books!

I love travelling, too. Love it. In fact, if I stay in a hotel fifteen minutes from my house, I’m perfectly content. Is that traveling? Is that pathetic to think it’s traveling? There’s something about a clean room that you don’t have to clean that is very appealing. And it’s quiet in hotels. So blissfully quiet. But I digress.

Speaking of Rome and the Trevi fountain and wishes. What three wishes do you have?

1) Keep my family and friends healthy.

2) Grant all of my husband’s dreams.

3) Don’t let the flow of ideas for my novels stop 🙂 !

Have a yummy recipe or two you want to share for the readers who love to cook? (Unlike myself. I love the eating part. When I meet you, Rosanna, you cook, I’ll eat what you cook.)

In the back of both of my novels, I’ve listed a few of the recipes that were mentioned in the books. I’ve had several readers contact me and tell me they tried the recipe for Palline di Limone (Lemon Cookies) that was featured in the back of BELLA FORTUNA. That’s always been an especially yummy and popular recipe with everyone. My personal favorite is a recipe I received from my mother, who received it from her mother, called Ravioli Fritti (Fried Pastry Ravioli).

Thank you, Rosanna!

Share this:

No Comments »

09.22.2013

Writing And Editing Through Life

Writing a novel can sometimes feel like trying to pull out one of your own teeth with your toes.

Writing a novel can also feel like an awkward dance through literary fun. I love to live in my imagination and tell myself stories. When I was a child this is what I spent most of my time doing, and I’ve simply brought my hobby into my cranky middle age.

It is strange. I am strange. I accept it.

But since I do prefer to keep my teeth, I organize and set writing and editing goals so as to keep the suffering at a minimum. I also try to do things every day to relax the ole’ brain and keep it filled with color and lightning and nature.

Currently, I am on the third edit of my eight novel. It is giving me hot flashes.

On my first draft, as usual, I wrote 2,000 words a day, 10,000 a week. This is my favorite time, although I do moan and groan about it. The first draft takes about three – ish months to write.

Then I start the editing process. I make a goal each week to edit a certain amount of single spaced pages. The first edit takes about two months to do. I edit about ten single spaced pages a day, sometimes uttering bad words. The book is total crap at this point, so it takes a long time and a lot of chocolate.

Same with the second edit. Total crap. More bad words. The third edit, I try to whip through fifteen single spaced pages a day, the fourth twenty pages, etc. Eight edits in all.

The last two edits, before the book goes to my editor and agent, take about a week or two each. It is not so crappy anymore. (Although I suppose some people would debate that with me.)

I try very hard to to keep my creativity alive and skipping.

That can be hard with life sometimes. Life is not always pleasant, as you well know. Problems arise. Heartaches occur. Relationships are up and down. Housework must be done. The evil morning glory in my yard must be hacked back and I must find clean socks.

So that I don’t box myself into my suburban life too hard, I take long drives in the country to clear my mind. I recently returned from writing at the beach. My husband and I spent a night in central Oregon to visit his uncle, a former WWII fighter pilot. All these things helped. Coffee helps, too.

But sometimes, late at night, I have to get back to the basics and grab my journal. I have to focus on my difficult, secretive, multi – layered characters who do not come to me complete. Or even semi – complete. Often it feels like they are deliberately pushing back at me and I have to hack away at their shells with a machete.

Every single edit brings the characters out more. By the end of the book, I know them. But often not until the seventh edit are their personalities and lives and flaming faults and craziness totally clear to me.

Same with the plot. Plots can ebb and flow like whiskey and tidal waves. Sometimes I find myself down a road I absolutely should not be on. I am lost and trying to slay dragons and odd men.

Sometimes I will delete thousands of words – my record is 25,000 words – in less than an hour. I kill off characters you never have to meet.

But when I’m struggling, I pull out the journal I’m currently scribbling in and cut out magazine photos to set my brain on fire again. I need to see the book and my characters in new ways. These are some of those photos I glued in last night at two in the morning.

Ten pages to edit today… I need more coffee.

My journal

Share this:

1 Comment »

09.12.2013

Book Group Questions For If You Could See What I See

1. If you were going on a trip, would you take Regan, Brianna, Meggie, Lacey, or Tory with you? Why? Where would you go? What would you do? What advice would they give you about your life?

2. Describe Meggie. What are her strengths and weaknesses? Was she fair to the police chief, Blake Crighton?? What did her clothes say about her? Would you want to be friends with her?

3. Aaron Torelli did not admit to Meggie that he had severe mental health issues before he married her. Should he have? What was Meggie’s obligation to him after she found out? What should she have done differently in her marriage? What would you have done? Would you have left sooner than she did? Would you have left at all?

4. Was Meggie justified in leaving Aaron after he had an affair, despite his severe mental health issues? Was Meggie justified in having an affair with Henry while still married to Aaron?

5. How did you like the structure of the book? Did the flashbacks to Meggie’s marriage enhance the story? What are the overarching themes? What did the tree house symbolize? What did Mount Hood and Lace, Satin, and Baubles symbolize?

6. Is Lacey a good mother? Can you relate to her struggles as a working mother to three unique teenagers? Did you like Tory? Was her anger merited? Did Scotty deserve the wood carving in his front yard?

7. Hayden Rockaford said, “I know I was supposed to be born a girl but something got messed up. I think that somehow, when my mom was pregnant with me, something went wrong. It’s not like I’m wrong, or I’m a mistake, and it’s not her fault, not my fault, but something didn’t connect in there right. For me, what happened is the right plumbing didn’t grow in. The plumbing was switched. That’s it. I’m in the wrong body.”

What did you think of this character and his struggles? How was it handled by the author?

8. “Kalani Noe applied for a job at the factory as a seamstress. Her husband did not want her to have a job. A job meant independence. A job meant money. Both threats to him. Her lip was split in half. One eye was swollen shut, and there was a bruise down her left cheek. During the interview, she kept dabbing at her ear, which her husband had partially bitten off.”

Why did the author put Kalani in the story? Contrast Kalani’s life with the O’Rourke sisters’ lives. What does her future look like?

9. Which scene did you enjoy the most? Which scenes made you laugh? Were there any scenes that made you cry or were especially touching? Were there any scenes that reminded you of your own life or struggles?

10. Of all the bra videos that Meggie took, which voice was the most memorable, the most poignant to you, and why? Did the bra videos enrich the story?

11. Regan O’Rourke said, “I am not defined by my body or what has happened to it. I am not defined by beatings or an arching whip or a dangerous man, or by the wreckage of prostitution. I am not defined by my age. I am not defined by what others think of me. I am defined by myself. I will define myself to me. I will live, I will laugh. I will love. I will not be silenced. I will not be invisible. I will be me until the very end. And I will look beautiful. . . . I dared to live the way I damn well wanted to live.”

Are you like Regan?

12. Brianna O’Rourke says that women lose interest in sex because “oftentimes women are simply not attracted to their partners anymore. Their partners are boring in bed or self-centered, inane, ridiculous, abusive, or gross. It’s not what men want to hear. They want to blame their wives and girlfriends, but it’s the truth.

Sometimes women are flat-out exhausted. There can be medical issues, like thyroid problems or depression. There can be hormone issues, too. Who likes blowing up in bed with night sweats? Working too hard will kill a sex drive, too, as can motherhood and its demands.”

Is she right? How does Brianna’s own admission to not liking sex impact her ability to be an effective sex therapist, or does it?

13. Brianna was not honest with Lacey and Meggie about Sperm Donor Number One and Two. What does that say about Brianna? How will this impact their relationship in future? What should Lacey and Meggie do? Contact the fathers or leave things alone? What would you do? If the story continued, where do you think the author would take that plotline?

14. Discuss Meggie’s character arc. What were the most significant events in the book that caused her to change by the end?

15. If you were in the Fashion Story, what lingerie would you design for yourself? What would your videotape say about you?

16. Grandma Regan and the O’Rourke sisters had many adventures with the Bust Out and Shake It Adventure Club list. What’s on your list?

Share this:

No Comments »

09.05.2013

For Writers: That Pesky Social Media/Marketing/Publicity Question

I am often asked by established and new authors about publicity.

As in, what should I do to publicize my book? Or, what do you do, Cathy?

To be quite honest, I’ve gone round and round with the social media/marketing/PR question endlessly. By the end of my own debate, I want to poke my eyeballs out.

My publishing house does a lot for me in terms of advertising and marketing, which I am utterly grateful for, and it helps enormously, but what else do I do, personally?

Basically, I only do what I like to do because I don’t like doing what I don’t like to do. I am too old for that.

Here is what is worth your time, in my opinion, and what I like.

1) Create A Website. A website, professionally done, is a needed banana. (I just made that phrase up for fun) It’s where readers learn about you, your life, and your other books. They can write to you here, too.

2) Facebook. Of course. No brainer. Easy and fun, readers can chat informally with you, and you can post funny/thoughtful/interesting things about your life and books. Do not over post. Do not make them sick of you.

3) Amazon and Goodreads. Set up author pages. Once it’s set up – it’s set up. You add a photo of yourself looking as good as you can possibly look, some bio information that you’ve probably already written for your website, fill in a few questions, add photos here and there, link your blog in, make sure your book covers are up correctly and, voila, you’re done.

4) Speak at Book Groups. I love them! I will go to book groups if they’re 15 minutes from my house in Portland, Oregon, because they’re fun and interesting and I love to chat with women. I also skype with book groups and speak with them on speaker phone.

5) Blogging. I try to blog about my books, writing, and what’s going on in my own little world. Life and deadlines sometimes get in the way, but if you can blog once a week (which I don’t because I’m swamped and need to spend time daydreaming) you should.

I love Jane Porter’s blog – current, short entries, lots of photos, fun, personal. http://janeporter.com/janeblog/

You can also feature other authors, and they’ll post your interview on their blog. I post excerpts of my books sometimes, which is easy, to help promote them. (Like I did here, in running my own covers down the side of this web page!)

6) Pinterest. I made up a board (Think of Pinterest as an online bulletin board) for each of my novels and will do so later for my short stories in the anthologies. Simple to set up, you don’t need to keep going back to it. You pin pretty pictures to your boards, add a tagline to advertise the characters in your book, the plot, etc. and you’re done. Readers get an idea of your book via pictures.

A question you might have is, So, Cathy, what about running from book store to book store and giving presentations about your book?

If you are already a popular, well known author, (John Grisham, Geraldine Brooks, Khaled Hosseini) this could be a very worthwhile venture, especially because the publishing house picks up the cost.

But I’ve known authors who spent endless hours, days, weeks, months promoting their books, driving from book store to book store like a reading robot. That is not for me.

For one, unless you’re a Big Gun in the writing world, that cost is on you – the hotels, the gas, and the food when you’re on the road. Plus, you set those things up, you talk to the manager, you find a date, you go and speak.

I have also heard, repeatedly, from other authors, even well known ones, and from managers of bookstores, that often no one shows up, or it’s only 5 – 10 people, and they sell a few books. This is not worth your time. It’s smashingly bad for the ego, too.

If you do take yourself on a bookstore tour, you have to ask yourself at the end of it, and be brutal, how many books did you sell on those jaunts? Was it truly worth your time and effort and stress? Was it worth the time away from writing and the distraction? Did you lose money on it? (Probably that’s a yes).

Zipping to one bookstore after another is not for me.

I go to Powell’s when I have a new novel out. There’s about 60 – 80 people, and they sell a bunch of books. It’s pleasant, we laugh, I talk, I like it. I like Powell’s. Do I think that if I went to other bookstores that I would have the same turn out? I don’t. I know a lot of the people who come to Powell’s, they’re friends and neighbors, regular readers.

I do talk at library events and have found that that’s worth it because I can meet readers, and I can sell a bunch of my books. Plus, I truly like speaking at library events.

You absolutely must balance social media/marketing/PR for your book with your writing and your life. That stuff can eat up your time like a hungry Godzilla with extremely dubious results.

But HERE’S THE TRUTH, as I see it, the utter and inglorious truth.

What do I think really sells books?

Writing an outstanding book.

I absolutely believe that word of mouth is the best advertising. It is far, far better than doing all of the things I just listed above and will give you much less of a headache.

For example, I was at a book group recently and the women there talked about how they told all their friends, sisters, and neighbors about my books. That, above all else, is the best marketing. Sisters will read what their sisters loved. Friends will read what their friends loved. Neighbors will read what their neighbor on the other side of the fence read. You know how it is, women talk about everything – men, sex, decorating, movies – and books they love.

If you write an intriguing/gripping/thought provoking book, it’ll sell. Will you be a millionaire? Maybe. Most probably not. But you could definitely make a living.

Do the six things I posted above, but concentrate almost all of your energies on writing well. Writing excellently (Is excellently a word?). Write the best damn book you can write. Write your ass off.

That, truly, is your best publicity.

Share this:

3 Comments »

09.05.2013

Another Little Excerpt: If You Could See What I See

My grandma said that being around all the lingerie was what turned my mother on to romance and sex.

My mother said that was quite possible. The deciding factor, though, for a career outside the business, is that my mother and Grandma cannot work together.

My mother said she could not work with Grandma in the business because “I would kill her.”

My grandma said she could not work with my mother, “or I would have to visit the insane asylum on a weekly basis and take up serious drinking.”

They love each other; they cannot work together.

It’s like watching two bulls charging at each other at full speed in high heels and exquisite jewelry. Bulls can’t charge well in high heels, but you get the idea.

My mother went to college and took a class in psychology because a man she was interested in was taking it. She was hooked. Not on the boy, although she said there was a romance. She was hooked on psychology. She became a licensed therapist and started working with people, quickly finding the dynamics of marriage, a union she would have no part of. Fascinating. She combined her practice, which was soon incredibly successful, with a column on love and sex.

From there she started writing books, all of them honest, frank, and often funny, all of them best sellers. The goal: Better, hotter sex. Although she promotes wild and creative sex, she always, always harps that the best sex is had with a person you love and are committed to. She actively preaches that no teenager should be having sex.

She loves her job, but way beyond that she loves Lacey, Tory, and me. She loves her mother, too, although she refers to her as “The whiskey-drinking, cigar-smoking devil’s assistant.” My grandma refers to my mother as the “dildo-promoting, craft-obsessed sex queen.”

When my sisters and I were children, I don’t remember my mother having any boyfriends. When we were teenagers there were a few men, though they didn’t last long, and she never introduced us. There have been a few other men since, but not for a while. She is extremely private about that part of her life, and we know we don’t know the half of it.

Her legions of fans would be shocked to know how utterly domesticated my mother is. I believe this is in direct response to my grandma being a hard-core career woman, when most women did not have careers. My mother bakes, sews, embroiders, knits, quilts, and loves doing crafts.

In fact, her way of rebelling in high school was to have a knitting club, a quilting club, and a cooking club. The girls would meet at Grandma’s house once a week to chat, knit, quilt, and cook. Sometimes they even went to quilting and craft conventions.

As my mother tells it, this enflamed my grandma. She wanted her daughter out there protesting this or that, rebelling, finding herself, writing editorials in the paper, filleting the establishment, or, her most ardent hope, working with her at Lace, Satin, and Baubles to promote the company.

She wanted a hard-core businesswoman daughter who had loud opinions and a flaming mouth to share them. But no.

Knit, quilt, cook.

The funny thing is, my mother is still meeting with these women whenever she’s in town. The women have the following jobs: federal judge, owner of a cosmetics company, social worker, teacher, biologist, medical researcher, car wash owner, and then there’s Judy who owns a strip joint.

She loves being home in her Snow White cottage-style house, with her chintz, stripes, and flowers. You can almost see the dwarves, evil witch, and friendly animals around the corners. She loves cooking and listening to country music with the three of us, and Grandma, if she can “behave like a woman instead of a battle-ax-throwing, temperamental bra goddess.”

She has a practice in Portland and writes her columns and books from an upstairs office in her home, which is about ten minutes from mine, Grandma’s, Lacey’s, and currently Tory’s downtown condo.

Although she dresses drop-dead seductive, even inflammatory, when she’s on tour, at home she often wears pink crew necks and beige slacks. Another favorite? A white cable-knit sweater and blue slacks. She wears flats instead of four-inch heels. She pulls her hair back in a bun and wears her glasses and no makeup.

She meets her girlfriends, and they sew and craft and embroider all day long.

It’s blunt, kittenish sex therapist and Betty Crocker mixed.

Drives my grandma straight up the wall.

Share this:

1 Comment »

08.13.2013

How “If You Could See What I See” Was Written

Every book I write gets a journal. In fact, several of my books have had many journals. I write in the journals, scribble, sketch, star the good ideas, cross out the lousy ideas, and glue in magazine photos for inspiration.

Out in August, 2013

Before I write a book, I always have to figure out my gal’s occupation. That’s first. What does she do for a job? Does she like her job? Is it JUST a job, a stepping stone, or does she love it? Does she hate it? Why did she choose that occupation? I find people’s choice of jobs in real life fascinating, and it carries over to my book writing.

I then start to build my character. What is she like? Does she have a talent? Does she know the talent yet? What are her flaws? Is she a loner? Social? Married? Divorced? Outspoken, shy, quiet, sarcastic, troubled, sane, quick to fight, quick to cry?

What is her personal history? Where did she grow up? How? Bad childhood or solid and fun?

I give her family and friends. The family dynamic is endlessly interesting to me. Family relationships are a joy and, sometimes, a terror. They’re tricky, they’re beautiful, they may be the deepest relationships you’ll ever have, they may be the most treacherous and land – mine filled.

I also ask, where does she live now? What does her home look like? What does she look like? Frumpy? Stylish? Thin or curvy?

With IF YOU COULD SEE WHAT I SEE I was thinking about a few interesting elements before and during the writing process:

The sister relationship.

I'm getting to know my main gal...what does she wear? What are her shoes like? Feminine? Cowgirl? Tough?

See the lingerie in the left corner? It sparked a book.

An off the wall mother. And sex. (I tied these two together.)

A grandma with a past. (Grandma’s were young, too. They may have secrets.)

Ireland. (Where I would like to travel to.)

Strawberries. (Tasty. I’d like some shortcake.)

Lingerie. (Too bad I don’t fit in the stuff I have anymore.)

Blood. (Bad.)

A family business. (Now that’s a ticking bomb.)

Making a documentary film. (Can I travel?)

Teenagers. (I have three of them.)

I also was thinking a lot about marriage. Having been married twenty years, I still don’t think I fully understand it.

Here’s what my main character, Meggie O’Rourke, says about marriage:

“There are many questions I have about marriage. Not that I will get married again.

When we take vows “until death do us part,” the implication is that the marriage will last until someone is residing in a coffin. But is the death of a marriage, through affairs, abuse, neglect, addictions, personality disorders, or continual misery and loneliness, also death?

What if there were secrets you didn’t know before you married that you had a right to know? Isn’t your spouse breaking the vows before the vows are said? If so, does that mean we can walk out free and clear? When we make a commitment, is that forever, regardless of new circumstances?

Is it immoral to leave a mean or neglectful spouse if he comes down with a disease because you can’t tolerate the thought of being both caretaker and punching bag?

Is it immoral to leave a mentally ill spouse who won’t agree to treatment? Even if the person agrees to get treatment, is it okay to leave? What if by staying your health fails because you’re married to someone who will never be able to function as a spouse, who will always take and take and suck the life out of you? Is it fair to expect someone to give up their entire life to stay with a mentally ill spouse?

But isn’t staying when things get tough part of marriage? The good and the bad? The lucky times and the bad surprises? Rich and poor? What about the love you had for that person on your wedding day, the commitment you made? Wouldn’t you want that person to care for you, to love you, if your life fell apart? How can you justify leaving a spouse who has an illness in his head that he did not bring on himself?

What role do children play in a divorce? If there’s no abuse, and the spouse is a good-enough parent but a lousy mate, should we stay married, and suck it up, until the kids are grown? What do we owe our children? How much sacrifice is too much? Will a divorce simply cause a whole new set of problems, particularly for the children, and not solve anything?

What do we deserve in life, in marriage? Is it spoiled and entitled to even talk about “deserving more?” Is a good-enough marriage good enough? Do we expect too much?

I struggled with these questions years ago. The end result was staggeringly poor.

So. I threw all these thoughts together, plus a hundred more, daydreamed a ton, wrote a first draft, edited it eight times, sent it to my editor and agent, got their thoughts, edited it another four times during the edit/proofing/copyrighting part, had some very long and late nights, and it went out the door.

Hope you enjoy IF YOU COULD SEE WHAT I SEE.

Share this:

2 Comments »

07.19.2013

If You Could See What I See….Out August 1, 2013…An Interview With A Sex Therapist

Woman Magazine
Interview of Brianna O’Rourke, by Gabrielle Madeiro

Out in August, 2013

You have helped women all over the nation, even the world, get in touch with their sexuality. You write books, a popular column, and you’re a coveted guest on talk shows. Do you ever get tired of talking about sex?
Yes. Sometimes I never want to say “sex” or “sex toys” again in my life. But it’s not a twenty-four/seven occupation. I have a life. I have a mother, three daughters, and grandchildren. They are my priority. I also bake and I love to embroider. I sew and knit.
You knit?
Yes, I love knitting. Don’t you?
Uh, no. Do people come up to you in public and ask you about sex?
Yes, all the time. Happens in airports, restaurants, and cafés. For example, last night I was at a dinner and a man asked me what a clitoris was. He asked what he was supposed to do with it. I used two slices of lime, an olive, and half a cherry to explain it to him. I told him exactly what to do. He was so grateful he hugged me. I wrote instructions on the napkin. He took the napkin and ate the olive. I ate the cherry.
I also use bananas a lot—less intimidating. Apples come in handy, too, as do lemon quarters and chocolate fudge sickles.
Why do you think so many women reportedly lose interest in sex?
Many reasons. Oftentimes women are simply not attracted to their partners anymore. Their partners are boring in bed or self-centered, inane, ridiculous, abusive, or gross. It’s not what men want to hear. They want to blame their wives and girlfriends, but it’s the truth.
Sometimes women are flat-out exhausted. There can be medical issues, like thyroid problems or depression. There can be hormone issues, too. Who likes blowing up in bed with night sweats? Working too hard will kill a sex drive, too, as can motherhood and its demands.
There may be abuse in a woman’s background that needs to be addressed immediately.

Sometimes women don’t feel sexy anymore, too fat or frumpy, or they’re self-conscious performing. Let me tell you, ladies, dim the lights, light candles, put on a negligee, and your partner will be so glad he’s getting some, there should be no complaints. If there is, dump him and get a new partner.

You absolutely must get to the bottom of why you’re not interested in sex. There’s a reason, find it, attack it, get back in bed.
But does our society put too much emphasis on sex? Isn’t it okay to lose interest?
If you want to feel like you have a dried-up raisin living in the heart of your vagina, yes, it’s fine. If you want to lose that feeling of youth and vitality, sure, give it up. If you want to go to bed every night and simply sleep and give up your sexuality, go ahead. If you want to miss out on the rush of an orgasm, the intimacy with your lover, being in a close relationship, sure. Embrace the raisin.
You do sex counseling for couples. How does that work?
It words darn well, honey. First off, I listen to the husband and wife individually, then I work with them together. One of my clients, the wife, said that she doesn’t like sex because her husband treats her vagina like he’s holding a cattle prod and the cattle prod has to keep poking the vagina. It drove her bananas. He thought he was turning her on.

I was blunt and told him to knock it off. I had another husband complain because his wife made this singsong sound when they were having sex, like a tortured whale. I told her to make the sounds. It was awful. I told her to knock it off.

Those are easy fixes. Sex counseling can be painful because much of how a relationship is working or is completely dysfunctional comes out in a couple’s sex life. We get down to what’s going wrong between the two of them. Could be an affair, an addiction, the couple is not in love, or one person is gay or frigid or bored to death or a jerk.

Their sexual patterns could be at odds—one person wants it more than the other. It could be money issues, work issues, penis issues, vaginal dryness issues. We dig in and go.

Next I work with them about what they like during sex, and what they don’t. We talk boldly and honestly. When they leave, they’re usually pretty steamed up. My office overlooks the parking lot, and often they’re having sex in their car.
What should couples always do to have a happy sex life?
Have sex.
That simple?
Yes. Have it regularly. Have a Sex Night each week. Sex can be serious, passionate, fun, even funny. Try new things, new positions, new places. Try not to get arrested. That’s embarrassing.
Any other advice?
You must get to know your clitoris. You must figure out your orgasmic rhythm. You must figure out what you like and don’t like. You must ask your partner to do what you want to have done.
Also make a brutal assessment of yourself. Are you good in bed? Truly? Are you open to trying new things?

Adventurous? Exciting? Are you doing what you can to keep your partner in love with you? Are you a supportive, friendly, loving spouse or partner?
Anything else?
As my mother always says, “Live your life with love. When you die, that’s what you’re leaving behind.”

Share this:

1 Comment »

USA Today Interview

Cookies, pie, ice cream …

HAPPY EVER AFTER

written by Joyce Lamb, (no relation to Cathy Lamb) USATODAY12:43 p.m. EDT October 9, 2013

Cathy Lamb…Three Things That Inspire My Book Ideas…

Author to Author Interview: Liane Moriarty

Book Groups

Author to Author Interview: Rosanna Chiofalo

Writing And Editing Through Life

Book Group Questions For If You Could See What I See

For Writers: That Pesky Social Media/Marketing/Publicity Question

Another Little Excerpt: If You Could See What I See

How “If You Could See What I See” Was Written

If You Could See What I See….Out August 1, 2013…An Interview With A Sex Therapist

Recent Posts

Categories

Newsletter

Connect with me

Search

My Books