08.20.2018

A Wedding Dress Designer Who Does Not Believe In Weddings

Need a short and sweet beach story?

This is the opening scene to June’s Lace, on sale for $1.99.

Ten Things I’m Worried About:

Too many wedding dresses
Not enough wedding dresses
Grayson
Going broke
Losing my home
Never finding an unbroken, black butterfly shell
The upcoming interview with the fashion writer
Not having peppermint sticks in my life
Turning back into the person I used to be
Always being worried

 

And here’s another scene about June’s studio at the beach in a blue cottage where she designs unique wedding dresses…

My studio is filled with odd and found things. I need the color and creativity for inspiration for the non – traditional wedding dresses I sew. Weathered, light blue shutters from a demolished house are nailed to a wall. Two foot tall pink letters spell out my name, June. On a huge canvas, I painted six foot tall purple tulips with eyes, smiles and pink tutus. I propped that painting against a wall next to a collection of mailboxes in the shapes of a pig, elephant, dragon, dog, and monkey. The monkey mailbox scares me.

I dipped a strawberry into melted chocolate and kept stomping about. I eat when I get upset or stressed, and this had not proved to be good for the size of my bottom. Fifteen extra pounds in two years. After only four more strawberries, okay seven, and more pacing, I took a deep breath and tried to wrestle myself away from my past and back into who I am now, who I am trying most desperately to become.

“Remember, June,” I said aloud as my anger and worry surged, like the waves of the Oregon coast below me. “You are in your sky lighted studio. Not a cold, beige home in the city. You are living amidst stacks of colorful and slinky fabrics, buttons, flowers, faux pearls and gems, and lace. You are not living amidst legal briefs and crammed courtrooms working as an attorney with other stressed out, maniac attorneys hyped up on their massive egos.”

My tired eyes rested, as they so often did, on my Scottish tartan, our ancestor’s tartan, which I’d hung vertically on my wall. When I’d hung it in our modern home in Portland, he’d ripped it down and hid it from me for a month. “Tacky June, it’s tacky. We’re not kilt wearing heathens.”

I am a wedding dress designer in the middle of a soul-crushing divorce. I am a wedding dress designer who will never again marry. I am a wedding dress designer who has about as much faith in marriage as I do that the Oregon coast will never see another drop of rain.

A blast of wind, then a hail of rain pummeled my French doors.

I ate yet another chocolate strawberry. I have been told my eyes are the color of dark chocolate. Not a bad analogy. I washed the strawberry down with lemonade, then a carrot.

No, I have no faith in marriage.

None.

It was a bad day. It became worse after the next phone call.

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/s?url=search-alias%3Ddigital-text&field-keywords=beach+season+cathy+lamb

 

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08.16.2018

We Sure Will Miss You, Aretha

When I watch this video I can’t decide if I should get up and dance and sing along with Aretha or sit down and cry.

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08.14.2018

How Well Do You Really Know Your Husband?

My new book, The Man She Married, is out October 30.

Here is a short and sweet summary: Natalie Shelton is in a coma. That’s not her only problem.

Less than ten bucks:

My new book, The Man She Married, is out October 30.

Here is a short and sweet summary: Natalie Shelton is in a coma. That’s not her only problem.

 

 

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08.07.2018

Portrait Of Moi By My Lovely Sister

My sister, Dr. Karen Straight, painted this one!
Love you, Karen!

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08.07.2018

Such A Pretty Face Is Cheap-ola on Amazon

Just checking to see which one of my books is cheap-ola currently, and it’s this one…

Stevie Barrett has lost 170 pounds. She’s a new person who secretly builds fantastical chairs with wings, gardens to get the pain out, and has dreams that won’t quit. She also has nightmares about a bridge in her past and Sunshine. (No, Sunshine is not a grammar error….you’ll see.)

When I was writing about Stevie, she was so clear to me it was as if we’d grown up together. If you need a summer book, I’d suggest this one with lemonade for some scenes, and wine for others.

Happy day to all.

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08.07.2018

A Cursed Garden And A Book

This is where I’m trying to edit my latest book.

It’s pretty. There are some purple flowers. A couple of whirly things in the background. I can watch my cat do his odd cat – things.

One would think my garden would be a good place to create and cut and read and figure out what the heck is going on with this manuscript.

It’s not. It’s not a good place. It’s a terrible place. It’s obviously a cursed place.

Honestly, I think it would be easier to turn myself into a German Shepherd with a pink bow than edit this book.

I need chocolate. For nutrition.

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07.16.2018

Onward ho to Montana

I needed a little Montana in my life.

Wishing you a trip this summer where you can de-stress your sizzling brain and breathe and read cool books and eat good cake.

 

 

 

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07.04.2018

Cold Ice Cream and Cool Friends

Happy Fourth of July everyone!

May your day be filled with laughter and fireworks, cold ice cream and cool friends, and healthy food like hot dogs and hamburgers and apple pie.

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06.28.2018

Bike Riding At Midnight In Lingerie. Maybe for you?

My Very Best Friend is for people who have ever wondered if they should ride their bicycle through a Scottish village, on a bike, at midnight, in lingerie.

It’s on sale for $2.99.

Kobo and Amazon.

EXCERPT

My name is Charlotte Mackintosh.

I am thirty-five. I love science. I have degrees in physics and biology. One would think I would work in a lab or teach at a university. I don’t. I write time travel romance novels. My ninth book was released four months ago.

My pen name is Georgia Chandler. My mother was from Georgia, a southern belle, and Chandler was her maiden name.

For me to be a romance writer is a perplexing joke. What romance? I don’t have any in my life, haven’t for years, since The Unfortunate Marriage. I have named my vibrator Dan The Vibrator. That should tell you about the sexual action I get. Which is, so we’re all clear, none.

My late father, Quinn, was Scottish, hence my last name, and his mother had the Scottish Second Sight. She saw the future, all mottled up, but she saw it. Sometimes she didn’t understand it herself. I remember her predictions, one in particular when I was seven and we were making an apple butterscotch pie with a dash of cinnamon.

“You will travel through many time periods, Charlotte,” my grandma said, rolling out the pie dough with a heavy rolling pin, her gray curls escaping her bun like springs. “All over the world.”

“What do you mean?” I rolled out my dough, too. We were bringing the pies to the Scottish games up in the highlands the next day, where my father was competing in the athletic contests and playing his bagpipes.

“I don’t know, luv. Damn this seeing into the future business. Cockamamie. It will drive me to an early grave.”

“I want to travel to other planets and inspect them for aliens.”

She placed her pie crust into the buttered glass baking dish. “You will live different lives, child. You will love deeply. And yet…” She paused, her brow furrowed. “It’s not you.”

“I don’t think so, Grandma. I love science. Specifically our cells. Mutations. Sick cells, healthy cells. Toran and I pricked our fingers yesterday so we could study our blood under my microscope.”

She eyed me through her glasses. “You are an odd child.”

“Yes,” I told her, gravely, “I am.”

My grandma was right about time travel. She simply dove into the fictional realm of my life without realizing it. McKenzie Rae Dean, my heroine, travels through time, lives different lives, and loves deeply. But McKenzie Rae is not me. See how my grandma got things jumbled up and yet dead right, too?

Many of her other second sight predictions have come true, too. A few haven’t yet. I’m a little worried about the few that haven’t. Several in particular, as they’re decidedly alarming.

I live on a quiet island, called Whale Island, off the coast of Washington. I have a long white house on five acres. I rarely ever have to leave my view of the ocean and various whales, my books, garden, and cats. I have had enough of the world and of people. Some people call me a recluse. I call them annoying.

My publisher wants me to travel to promote my books. I went on book tours with the first book, hated it, and have refused to go again. They whine. I ignore them. What do they know? I stay home.

I walk my four cats in a specially designed pink cat stroller twice every day. They each have their own compartment with their name on a label in front.

I read gardening books for entertainment, but they are only second to my love of all things physics and biology. I have a pile of exciting books and articles in my house on both subjects, including astrophysics, string theory, the human genome project, and cellular and molecular biology. Seeing them waiting for me, like friends filled with enthralling knowledge, flutters my heart.

I might drink a tad too much alcohol. Wine is my vice. I drink only the finest wine, but that is a poor excuse for the nights the wine makes me skinny-dip in a calm bay by my house and belt out the Scottish drinking songs my father taught me while cart wheeling

I am going to Scotland because I must. My mother asked me to go and check on my father’s house, fix it up, and sell it. “I can finally close the door to the past,” she told me. “Without cracking down the middle, but I need you to go and do this, because if I go, I’ll crack.”

I told her, “That doesn’t make sense, Ms. Feminist.”

She waved a hand, “I know. Go anyhow. My burning bra and I can’t do it.”

I have not been back to Scotland in twenty years, partly because I am petrified of flying and partly because it’s too painful, which is why my mother, usually a ball breaker, refuses to go.

I’m nervous to leave my cats, Teddy J, Daffodil, Dr. Jekyll, and Princess Marie. Teddy J, in particular, suffers from anxiety, and Dr. Jekyll has a mood disorder, I’m sure of it. Princess Marie is snippy.

But it must be done.

My best friend, Bridget Ramsay, is still living there. Or, she was living there. We write letters all the time to each other; we have for twenty years.

Until last year, that is. I haven’t heard from her in months.

I don’t know what’s going on.

I have an idea, but I don’t like the idea.

It scares me to death.

Truth often does that to us.

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06.26.2018

No Tricks, A Few Treats: My New Book

Greetings to all!

My new book, The Man She Married, is out on October 30.

I’m tempted to call it a Halloween book. There are no monsters or dragons or witches in it, though, unfortunately.

There are no tricks. There are some treats.

Here’s a short and sweet summary:

Natalie Shelton is in a coma.
That’s not her only problem.

Less than ten buckaroos on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Man-She-Married-Cathy-Lamb-ebook/dp/B079KTVHGD

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Cathy Lamb
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